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Friday, January 26
Dear
VTwin Mama,
I’m getting tired of the same old poker runs, charity rides and other
events that our riding group participates in, but the old boy network
seems firmly in place. I don’t know how to get my ideas heard. –
Fed up in Toledo
Dear Fed
up,
Fire a gun into the ceiling at your next meeting? Probably just a tad too
radical! So let’s take a step back and find your backbone. Far be it for
Mama to suggest that perhaps, perchance, your ideas are not valued because
they are not well thought out. Of course, that couldn’t be it. So why
not organize an event yourself, sign up like-minded members, and go and
have some fun. If your idea is successful, others will follow. Sometimes
you have to jump ship to make waves. – Mama
Top
Monday, January 22
Dear
VTwin Mama,
I am so envious of my friend who always seems to be getting a new bike,
cool riding clothes and hot accessories. I’m starting to hate her and I
know that’s not fair. Any advice? – Green
around the gills in Ann Arbor
Dear
Green,
Shame on you for comparing yourself with a valued, trusted and
loving friend. That’s no way to live your life. Happiness is not a
matter of staying ahead of others, but simply staying ahead of ourselves.
You need a reality shot badly, so go volunteer a few hours at the local
hospital, pet shelter, old folks home, or any other place in your
community where things are probably a lot tougher. Then use Mama’s old
remedy – a good crying jag before bedtime and everything will be clearer
to you in the morning. Whining is NEVER attractive, so get a grip and get
on with it. – Mama
Top
Thursday, January 18
Dear
VTwin Mama,
All of my riding buddies are pairing off and getting married. I’m
feeling left out and ignored, but haven’t found the “right one.”
What should I do? – Dude in Denver
Dear
Dude,
Ah, do I smell the sweet smell of a man who yearns for
companionship? How does that old song go – love the one you’re with!
And right now that is you, so give yourself a break and realize that
sometimes things can feel out of whack when you’re the odd man out. My
guess is that soon, very soon, your buddies will be feeling the need to
reconnect with their lucky single friend, and you’ll be back in the
fold. Meanwhile, women are always interested in a sweet, sensitive, smart,
thoughtful, exciting man. If that sounds like you, in any part or portion,
then make goo goo eyes at the next available sweetie and reveal in fun.
Remember, the marriage solution usually lasts forever; but the problem may
only be temporary. – Mama
Top
Monday, January 15
Dear
VTwin Mama,
A friend met a motorcycle guy and now she’s always off riding with him.
I miss her and want my old friendship back. –
What to do in Tulsa
Dear
What,
Tell her what a rotten bitch she is, because of course, if the shoe
was on the other foot, you would understand if she said that to you. No?
The problem is change of course, and when your life remains the same,
change is a heavy burden to be endured. Time for you to expand your own
horizons because it sounds like you might be a little, just a tad,
dependent on this one friend. Friends come and go. Keeping them is a
matter of choice. – Mama
Top
Saturday, January 13
Dear
VTwin Mama,
There’s a hot new single guy who just moved to our area and joined the
local club. All the single women want to get to know him better, including
me. Help me win his attention. – Dying to get
to know him in Charlotte
Dear
Dying,
Ah, the classic battles begin! Let’s see . . . Let’s keep in
mind that ultimately, he should be chasing you or nothing you do will make
any sense. Even Mama hates to admit that chasing a man usually winds up so
. . . boring! Imagination is the key to this courting and snaring dilemma,
and will wipe out the competition to boot. It will take some doing to
figure out what he finds to be challenging, so mean while, no drooling.
The great thing about taking some time to size him up is that you get to
find out if he is even worth it! Hot does not necessarily equal long term
delicious. – Mama
Top
Wednesday, January 10
Dear
VTwin Mama,
I’ve been riding with my boyfriend and have been considering going solo
for several months now. How can I know this is the right decision? –
Squirmy in Seattle
Dear
Squirmy,
It depends. Do you mean getting your own bike and riding solo? If so, who
cares if it’s the right decision?!?!?!?! Make a choice, stick with it,
and you’ll find that whether the decision was right or wrong, you have a
whole NEW set of decisions waiting for you. Remain in limbo purgatory and
you’ll never GET ANYWHERE!
If
you mean leaving the boyfriend, well . . . . How am I supposed to know?
Oops, that sounded mean. OK, here’s my best advice. Make a list.
That’s right, a list. Two columns of characteristics important to you.
Then, on, the left side, write down what you absolutely need and on the
right side, what you wish for in your dream man. Then, compare your guy to
this. If he meets all the requirements of the left . . . Does this help?
Remember, sometimes the undoing of something is simply because you spent
too much thinking. I feel a sympathetic headache coming on.
– Mama
Top
Monday, January 8
Dear
VTwin Mama,
One of the guy’s in our riding group has a new girlfriend and the women
are trying to make her feel welcome, but she still acts standoffish. What
should we do? – Getting huffy in Miami
Dear Huffy,
Gosh, that could be lots of things, don’t you think? Trying to figure
out other people’s peculiarities is always so . . . fruitless. Suffice
it to say, your friend will eventually notice his new girlfriend’s less
than chummy attitude and take action. Oops, we are talking about a guy
seeing what is going on! OK, bash him over the head and ask him what’s
up. If he’s clueless, but smitten, let it be. Sometimes people are wary
when others are quick to welcome them to a new group and are unsure of
what it is they really want themselves. Maybe she can’t believe she’s
stooped so low as to go out with a motorcycle guy, but hasn’t got
anything better to do. This too shall pass. –
Mama
Top
Monday, January 1
Dear VTwin Mama,
A really nice guy with a great bike asked me to go on a ride. The problem
is that he wants to cruise on a Saturday and that’s the day I usually
clean my apartment. What do you think? –
Wondering in Poughkeepsie
Dear
Wondering,
Mama thinks you’ve been getting to close to
your cleaning products. Live a little! Sure, a clean place is great, but
the feel of a motorcycle beneath you is to die for! Call the guy up and
accept immediately. After all, he’s not asking you to get married. You
can blow the Saturday schedule this once, and if you like it as much as I
think you will, say goodbye to the mops on any regular kind of basis. Are
you dialing yet? GO!!!!! And don’t forget to wear the right gear for
safety. – Mama
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