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Jitters Home
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2004 (January to July) Dear
VTwin Mama, Now that I am officially road ready I don't know if I'm emotionally prepared for navigating through the city. I live in Austin, Texas and any time of the day is total chaos on the roads. I don't want to ride around the city but have to go through the city to get to the long stretches out to the Hill Country. I am very apprehensive about setting out for the first time. There is at least one close call for me every other day and I'm in a midsize car. I almost got side swiped by a huge truck (which everyone here has, it is Texas after all) just yesterday on my way to do my taxes. Oh, and no one here seems to believe in insurance. Do have any suggestions? Really, I know that it's different for everyone but I was hoping that I could get some stories from other VTwin Mamas about their first experiences. That might help me calm my nerves about city riding. I also wanted to thank you for your site and your dedication to it. I know you must hear these types of questions all the time and yet you answer all of our questions with patience, understanding and excellent advice. I think I can speak for everyone when I say that you are so appreciated. I personally am so grateful for the service that you provide I can't truly express it in words. Anyway back to the nerves about city driving, any suggestions VTwin Mama's out there?– Karen Dear
Karen, You are SO NOT ALONE in expressing new rider traffic jitters. All you have to do is read my Jitters page to realize this! I will repeat advice I gave in January -- contact a local women's riding group and get yourself a mentor. Or, try my Let's Ride page for a VTwin Mama sister in your area who might offer to ride with you in the beginning stages in traffic. Having a veteran rider with you as you venture out might prove to be the ticket. If you are determined to go out on your own, you will find that early Sunday mornings offer the least amount of traffic. Start with small trips in your neighborhood, where you absolutely know the traffic lights, turn lanes and other traffic configurations you'll meet up with. One suggestion we've discussed over time is to "pre-ride" a short route in your car to review all of these things (and identify potential hazards, such as pot holes, parked cars, etc.) In this way, you'll boost your confidence. In addition, once you've chosen your ride route, envision a good ride in your mind. Sit at the kitchen table, close your eyes, and ride your bike through the route. See yourself confidently handling the stops and turns. Really, it works! Another, and kinda weird suggestion, is to make sure that you know how to pick up your bike in case you meet with a situation that tips you over. That way, you're not stuck for taking care of the situation should it become a challenge. There are a few sites on my Cool Links page that offer picture by picture steps. Practice at home and you'll have the control you'll need forever! You wouldn't believe the "power" this will give you. I know you can do it, and remember, small steps will lead you to your ultimate big dreams! By the by, thanks for taking the time to express your views on the VTwin Mama site. It's nice to know that I'm making a difference! – Mama For Karen who has her license and bike and is ready to get on the road, but has some concerns: Congratulations Karen! Boy! I sure can relate to how you feel. In November I took my motorcycle safety class where I learned to ride. Of course in class I rode little 250s, but I needed a bike that would be able to keep up with my husband's 1400cc Harley and would be comfortable for longer trips as we plan to travel on the bikes. My husband also warned me that if I got a small bike I'd be buying another one soon; I really didn't want to have to do that. Anyway, one week after I graduated from the class, I bought a 2003 Suzuki Volusia. It is 800cc and weighs over 500 lbs. Boy was that different than what I rode in class! A lighted, empty parking lot was the confidence builder for me. What I did at first was ride to a local park after dinner. It had a pretty good size parking lot and was only about a half a mile away, but believe me, the two turns I had to make to get there were VERY frightening at first. Once I got there I rode for at least an hour at a time making stops and turns, over and over again. I'm don't think I ever got out of 2nd gear. Each time became a little easier. I must have done this at least a half a dozen times, literally. Finally, I went out with my husband, but didn't even try to keep up with him. I ended up back at the parking lot. Each time it got easier. Just remember what they taught you in class...look where you want the bike to go and use the clutch to control the power to the rear wheel. I repeated these things over and over in my head, and still do every once in awhile now. I have over 1,000 miles now (3 months) and just recently began feeling very comfortable on my bike. I love it now and am so glad I learned to ride and got the bigger bike first. BTW, I did drop my bike (twice). Fortunately, I had engine guards and didn't do much damage...other than to my pride that is! Now that I think about it, I did break a perfectly good mirror which cost me 60 bucks to replace! ...oh well, it was very much worth it. Anyway, if you don't have a large parking lot that you feel comfortable in riding to yourself, maybe someone can take your bike there for you. I hope some part of this has helped you to build your confidence. Regardless, find what works for you, get out there and enjoy! There is nothing else like the feeling you get when you and your bike finally feel as one. Best wishes and again, congratulations! – Denise (note from Mama: sound advice from a rider who has recently "been there" and followed her gut instinct to get acclimated to "real" riding. Way to go, and yes, you're first hand account is sure to help Karen -- even if it's only to remind her that she IS NOT ALONE!) Wednesday, February 25 From Karen to Denise, who offered her support about new rider's jitters: This is in response to Denise who wrote in me about my bundle of nerves about getting on the road with my new machine. I wanted to say the following in response to her. Thank you so much for responding Denise. I really appreciate you sharing your experience with me and it was a great help to me. It gave me hope that I would conquer my beast. I think my problem was not only size but the power of the engine. I also had/have problems with stalling. I think my clutch lever needs adjusting. It doesn't start grabbing until it's at the end of my fingertips and it wasn't that way with the 250's I practiced on in class. I was terrified of stalling in the wrong place and getting smushed. Since sharing my fears with the other VTwin Mama's and reading the archives I've realized that most things on my bike can be altered to fit my needs. With that ammo of information I'm off to get some things adjusted to fit my small hands. Over all I love my bike. She's beautiful, handles well and is just the right weight for me to feel in control. If it wasn't for the clutch I think my nerves would be much better. Again thank you for sharing Denise and thank you to everyone that took the time to support this VTwin Mama sister. – Karen (note from Mama: there's nothing like sharing a thank you note to another reader who took the time to respond. Now, go figure out that clutch beasty 'cause you definitely don't need the clutch engagement point at the end of the overall release. If necessary, get a service manual for that bike to begin learning basic things you can be doing by checking for sources on my Books/Mag page, or don't hesitate to ride over to the dealer and have a service person do a quick adjustment. It's a new bike and this should be corrected as soon as possible. You go girl!) More for Karen who has her license and bike and is ready to get on the road, but has some concerns: I started riding last summer, and this year I bought a new HD Sportster. I found that the larger, more powerful bike gave me more confidence when riding in traffic. However, just a week ago, I dropped the bike while sitting at a stop sign. I got it back up and rode that evening with no problem, but the next day, a Saturday, I was extremely nervous and just felt like I couldn't do anything right. That Sunday, our neighbor, who has been riding for years, went out with us. He stayed near me and rode "down" to my level, and by the end of the ride, all my confidence was back. It really helped to ride with someone so experienced. Perhaps Karen can try riding with a local club or a few more experienced bikers who can help get her confidence level up. – Li in Florida (note from Mama: well, there you have it! A "true" confession that stuff happens, no matter what the range of experience is! I heartily agree that finding good riders who can mentor in the beginning stages is a great idea -- so how's that going Karen? Have you considered contacting local groups yet?!) Thursday, March 4 Dear
VTwin Mama, First let me thank Li in Florida for the advice. I definitely think that you're right, riding with a more experienced rider would help tremendously. So I hit the Internet trying to find riding groups in my area. I found a riding group that consisted of both men and women that meet regularly to ride in my area. I haven't gotten out with them yet but I will. The moderator of the group has emailed me and welcomed me with open arms. It's been cold and wet here lately but the sun has finally broken through and I think I'm going to take him ( the group coordinator) up on his offer. I've wanted to learn to ride for a long time and I am determined to become a good, safe and responsible rider. I am determined to be proficient at riding and I know that as with everything it will take time and lots of practice. With the support and wealth of knowledge of my VTwin Mama sisters out there I know that I will make it. Just a small note: I read this site everyday and see all the questions and comments from you wonderful women. It makes me curious as to what you look like and what your machines look like. I would like to petition for more pictures in the gallery so that I can match the names with the faces. For the lady's that I have already matched names with faces I wanted to say "ya'll are lookin' good out there!!" Big hugs VTwin Mama (Petra) -- you know how I feel about you, nothing but love baby. Keep up the good work). Be safe ladies, – Karen Dear
Karen, Dear
VTwin Mama, Dear
Michele, Ha! I think ultimately your hubby dearest wants a confident riding partner to share the experience and thrill of riding side by side for the long run. HOW you achieve this is BEST decided by you. He cannot gauge your nervousness, your learning curve, or do the "work" of learning to ride for you. It's time to lay the cards on the table. Does your household budget allow for the purchase of a used 250cc bike? Check the newspapers in your area and give a call to local riding groups to see if anyone has "graduated" up to a bigger bike and is looking to sell a smaller one. I have also been receiving personal notes from women who are reporting how HAPPY they are that they contacted a local women's riding group -- to find a mentor! Someone other than hubby dearest (who might be too "close" to the source) that can share parking lot practices and short runs in the neighborhood. Do not discount this idea. Check my Cool Links page for the top riding organizations -- then GET ON THE PHONE OR EMAIL them! Nobody can make you do anything you do not wish to do or are not ready for or feel overwhelmed by. Find the solution in your heart and then do a reality check with your husband. It's time to face "the music" with sound, practical suggestions that are going to get you riding with confidence. Now, GO DO IT! This is your Mama talking! – Mama ("Whatever you can, or dream you can, begin it. Boldness has genius, power and magic in it." -- Goethe) Saturday, March 20 For Michele who is having big bike jitters: I am a new rider as well and am quite intimated by riding a bigger bike. I got a tip from this site to check out the Motorman's Ride Like a Pro site. So I did just that. They "just" came out with a VHS and DVD video for Ride Like Pro for Women. The VHS is ready to ship now and the DVD will be ready for shipment on 3/23. It deals with women challenging the weight of a bigger bike. I just ordered mine and should get it soon so I can't say if it is helpful or not, but I have heard awesome testimonies on his Ride Like a Pro videos and this one is for women. I believe his wife is the rider. Anyway, check it out it is on this website www.ridelikeapro.com. Hope it helps! – Kristie (note from Mama: WOW -- this is great news! And thanks for letting me know! $24.95 for the Ride LIjka Pro for the Ladies video. I'm going to update my Reading Sources page and Jitters page to announce this as well!) And here is an update from Michele herself: Hi. Just wanted to give you an update on my situation. Last week my husband and I were talking about motorcycles and riding and believe it or not, HE suggested a smaller starter bike for me. There is a God!! I supposed I was afraid to admit to him that I was having trouble with the Sportster because I would feel like a disappointment and failure. Also next month I am taking a one day practice riding class the MSF offers through a local college. I found a riding buddy through the local H.O.G. chapter and hope to get together with her this Summer. Thank you for your words of support and letting me know it's o.k. to take a step back. (note from Mama: major yahoo for you! I'm so excited that you'll be moving forward in pursuing your dream of riding in a way that makes sense for you. This is a testimony to every woman out there who isn't sure she can really do it. Congrats and hugs to your hubby for being there for you!) Dear
VTwin Mama, Dear
Very Frustrated, So, let's dig deeper into your feelings about not being able to relax. Ask yourself this question: am I worried about what could happen because my riding skills are at a level that I'm not sure I could handle a bad situation on my own? If the answer is yes, then you may want to consider exploring additional ways to hone your riding skills to increase your knowledge of the bike, how it handles, and how you can become a master of its energy, power and characteristics. If the answer is no, then I think there is no shame in admitting that solo riding is just not for you. You would not be the first, nor will you be the last. While you did not indicate your husband's thoughts, I caution you that the most important person in this decision is YOU, and while friends and family may have an opinion, and are allowed to voice them, ultimately you must seek that which is right for YOU. Amazingly enough, I think the true answer for YOU is really something you already know deep in your gut -- so have the courage to let it out and then get on with enjoying the ride, solo or not. I'm behind you 100% no matter what you choose. You're a brave sister for bringing up this issue and I wish you the best of luck in the future. Now, go out and figure the best way to enjoy it! – Mama Monday, April 5 Picture this: it had been 20 years since I rode solo, and then only on dirt bikes... I get my bike up and going after a weekend of working on it (it had been sitting for 2 years in someone else's garage, until I bought it). I had forgotten how to downshift, had to be coached (while going down the road). I have dropped my bike 3 times now, the first two from a standing position, the third time on the street while doing about 15 miles an hour (sand on the road, tried to stop, bike took on whole new personality: rode the rest of the run anyway, even though I bruised a bone in my left hand, in a lot of pain). My determination to not let all that stop me got me to continue riding solo. But... I still have days when I look at the bike wistfully and wish I could get over my fear of the unknown. It absolutely overwhelms me some days. I don't like riding behind my hubby, he hot rods the shifting process slamming his bike and passenger around (he used to race and ride on dirt, hill climbing and such). On the days I can't handle riding solo, I do ride with hubby. I enjoy the ride and don't worry about it. A little worry while riding solo is a healthy thing in my book. You need to worry about what the other drivers out there are doing or seemingly going to do. It will save your skin especially when you're unsure in a tricky situation. Pull over if you need to, I do. Hubby usually asks me at that point, "are you alright?" "Yeah, can't explain it, but just needed to pull over." It's ok. It's healthy, take your time and don't stress over it. Some days you'll ride with hubby and others you'll prefer to ride your own. It's ok, don't let it get to you. Great issue, by the way. It lets the rest of us out there with the same problem know we're not alone. Thanks. – Traci, KCMO (note from Mama: what a wise VTwin Mama sister you are . . . I was thinking it had to be one or the other, but you're soooo right . . . it can be both. I'm going to email VF and make sure she reads your letter!) Tuesday, April 6 Great advice from Mama. Nothing wrong with riding one-up -- the point is whether you are one-up or solo, you are riding and enjoying being on a motorcycle, out and about, and part of the freedom and thrill. You go, Girl! No matter what you decide, you have a lot of us cheering for you.– Linda in Texas (note from Mama: what a wonderful letter of support. It's so important that women (and men) understand that that solo riding women aren't looking down their noses at passenger riding women -- that takes a special talent and love as well!) Dear
VTwin Mama, The Shadow has not been ridden in over a year. ( a shame). I tried it one time and dropped the bike as I could not hold it up when I came to a stop. So I was too scared to try to use it as my bike (I am 5'2" tall and could barely touch with tip toes). So he took me shopping for bikes, we decided since he was in the crotch rocket phase that in order for me to ride with him I needed bike to keep up with him. So we say a Katana 600 and took it home. A beautiful bike that I once again had to tip toe on to hold it with both feet. My first ride I made it 10 miles on the back roads, no problem. Drove it back home to get a jacket because our friends wanted to go out for a ride that night. On my way back to my friends house, as it was getting dark, I am stopped on a hill at a stop sign. The hill was banked as well. Well needless to say I dropped the bike again and cracked my helmet on the ground. . . thank goodness for helmets. So my husband decides that bike is not the bike for me and gets me a a Honda Shadow 600 (Gawd how I loved this bike) My first trip out was a dream! My second trip out was a disaster. For some reason I forgot how to make a left turn from a stop. Ran right over a curb, destroyed my bike, broke my foot. I spent the next two months recovering, thinking over can I ride, is this the thing for me. My husband by this time, I have bought you two bikes you just can't ride. Well, I have not given up. I am now a owner of 2003 Ninja 500. But this is my real dilemma, I would be great if I could to ride in a parking lot, I would have no problems riding. But the traffic and road construction here scares me. My husband wants me to ride with his crotch rocket group at night. The can reach speeds of 100mph or better. I tell him I am not ready for that yet. But he only gets frustrated and tells me until I do it I will never be ready. But I have to admit, I have dropped the bikes so many times that I am scared. I have asked him to take me out so I can get some experience riding in, saddle time as they call it. but the moment 11:00 on Saturday and Sunday rolls around . . . his buddies are already calling him to go riding. Meanwhile all I hear about is how that bike needs to be ridden. Which I agree, but I don't want to do it alone. What if I drop the bike and can not get it back up? I know I am making a lot of excuses but frankly, I am just scared of getting hurt and being alone. What can you advise me to do? I have tried to get back into a MSF class again but they are all booked till September. Lonely and Scared, – Ladykruzer Dear
Ladykruzer, It's time to pay strict attention to what YOU need. My suggestion is to immediately contact any and all women you can find in your area until you find a mentor, someone who understands what you're going through (because she remembers her beginning rides), has time to doodle around slowly in the neighborhood you're comfortable in, and slowly help you regain confidence. So, start by checking for any listings in my Let's Ride section -- can't guarantee that the women listed in your area (if there are any) would be willing to help, but a nice email explaining what you're looking for will get the ball rolling, so to speak! Then, go to my Cool Links page where every major women's riding organization has a link at the top, click on their sites, and find the chapter nearest to you. Repeat emailing strategy. My opinion is that your husband is just pushing you too fast for your comfort level and you're jazzing in the brain 'cause you can't "perform" to his expectations. It's great that he is SO looking forward to you riding with him and the "buds," but let's face it -- it's just not realistic, and you are SO NOT ALONE in this. Now, go forth and email. You need your own buddy! – Mama Thursday, April 8 For Ladykruzer whose jitters are getting the best of her and is scared and alone: I know the feeling, because I only recently started riding, and traffic is scary. I have a friend I ride with, but he likes to ride fast, too, and I just didn't feel ready at first to keep up with him. In fact, for a while I actually found it very stressful to go with him. So, for more "saddle time," I started going out on short trips (15-20 min) by myself so I could go at my own pace and learn how to handle my bike. At first I just went around the block a few times, but then I started to go a little farther out. I tried to avoid heavy traffic and stuck to back streets where there was little traffic and the speed limit was slow. After a short time, I started gaining confidence, and am finally to the point where I am really loving riding. I am now able to pretty much keep up with my riding buddy, although he still takes risks I am just not willing to take. But, when he zooms off to "have fun," I just ride along and know that eventually he'll slow down and I'll catch up to him. And in the meantime, I'm having a great ride. I would suggest to Ladykruzer that she do just that -- take short rides around the neighborhood, ALONE, just to get the feel of the bike, then go a little farther when she's ready. The most important thing is for you to go at your pace. DO NOT let anyone pressure you into doing something you aren't capable of. Her husband and his friends may like to go 100mph, but there are very few people who are actually qualified to do that, let alone capable of it, and I doubt they're going to a track, so on top of everything else, they're breaking the law. – Li in Florida (note from Mama: thank you so much for sharing your similar feelings and experiences -- this type of letter goes a long way to letting other riders know that they ARE NOT ALONE when they express fear but a burning desire to keep at it!) For Ladykruzer whose jitters are getting the best of her and is scared and alone: I ,too, can relate to Ladykruzer, because I have been seriously thinking about selling my new bike I just upgraded to in October. I almost dropped it in my driveway last December, and haven't ridden it since. I have sat on it and started it, and I look through catalogs for accessories to customize it, but I can't seem to make myself go out on it. I am afraid I will never ever get off of the small country roads around where I live. My daughter said "So what? Just ride the country roads and enjoy." Part of the fear is our driveway is steep and has gravel. My husband keeps promising to fix it, but so far hasn't. Part of me says if you aren't going to ride get rid of it, the other part says you want to ride and you always feel better when you do. So at the present time, I will just keep reading your site, because believe it or not, it gives me much encouragement and hopefully these Oklahoma winds will die down enough for me to work up the courage and ride. I truly thank you for your site, Petra, please stay with it. God bless, – Snojean (note from Mama: thank you for letting Ladykruzer know that she SERIOUSLY is NOT ALONE! I sympathize with what you're going through right now, but am encouraged to hear that reading this site is keeping you "in the loop" with others and I'm hearing a tiny voice in you that says "I'm not ready to give up yet." As the driveway is the thing that is getting "your goat" right now, I would suggest that you ask your husband to wheel or ride that bike down the driveway until such time that he can do something with it, or, is it possible to park or store it nearby until such time so you don't have to navigate the driveway right now, perhaps a good neighbor? Just noodling some thoughts around so the driveway doesn't become your undoing!) For Snojean who is getting spooked about the steep gravel driveway: Chin up girl! You didn’t even drop the bike, which is more
than most of us can say! I snapped my mirror off trying to back out of a
gravel driveway and lived to ride another day. Get out on those country roads
THIS weekend. I live in Wednesday, April 28 Dear
VTwin Mama, Dear
Pat, The best and most experienced bikers cannot avoid an idiot cager that crosses their path -- but what they can do is master the handling characteristics of the bike so that they have the best possible chance of avoiding/surviving the problem that is put in front of them. This means learning how to steer, slow down, and maneuver the bike quickly in crisis situations. This means knowing how your bike reacts to the different things you do. Practice is the key. To help you, consider visiting my Reading Sources page -- you'll find an excellent instructional video for sale and books that talk about the entire riding experience, from basics to panic situations. Then, get that bike to an empty parking lot on a quiet Sunday morning, set up cones and markers and begin learning how to make the bike work WITH you! If necessary, build more confidence by signing up for a riding course -- they'll put you on a 250cc bike and put you through your paces. Then, you can take that 600 beastie and practice the same things you learned at the course! Please don't be discouraged -- it takes time, loads of it, to become an accomplished rider -- but if you're willing, it can be done and you'll be in position to enjoy your riding despite the potential dangers out there on the road. – Mama Wednesday, April 28 Dear
VTwin Mama, Dear
T., First, sell the bike. It sounds all wrong for you. Second, if this not financially feasible, or you really want to stick with it, take a riding course if you have not done so already. They'll put you on a 250cc bike so you can get your feet wet and learn basic skills. Your one month panic riding is not meeting your needs at this time. Third, this bike can be lowered by shaving some of the padding out of the seat, buying a new seat (check the Corbin line) or adding some height to yourself by adding a little bit more heel to your riding boots (a good shoe shop should be able to do this). Fourth, but not least (!), keep the bike, do the above, and learn from it. Then, when you've got some time under your belt, go back to the first suggestion, but now you'll be in position to better judge the make/model that is going to be your dream come true! Check my Motorcycles for Short Riders list for some suggestions! – Mama Thursday, April 29 Dear
VTwin Mama, Well, I took the intermediate course on 4/23 on a freezing, drizzly, cold day here in MA, just the way a girl likes it after 17 years. On small 125 Suzuki's. I loved it and took to it with soo much excitement. In the meantime, I was looking at bikes, my wallet and the road. Well ladies, I found a 650 VStar Yamaha left over from 2003 - yes, zero miles and got a great price. So I bought her, now I gotta drive her. I'll tell ya, I'm nervous as a cat up a tree; she's so much heavier, but just as small. BUT, I cannot wait till I get her home to moms yard. (I have an apt) The dealer is 45 minutes away, so my next hurdle is getting someone to drive it to moms house, then she's mine. I'm just going to take it slow. I feel confident, got all the gear, practice what I learned 'all the time in my head, plus I do the hand movements and read to totally understand the manual.' So I'm ready, but jittery too. They have Blessing of the Bikes in a town close by on Mothers Day, now that is something I want to partake in. We can do this!! Oh yeah, go and join a women's riding group, I joined WOW, they are so welcoming and encouraging. Invited me into their group without even joining or having a bike then. I attended a mechanic day for my first visit - another confident booster. WE Can Do This! This is a wonderful website, Godspeed – Tracey in Lowell, MA Dear
Tracey, But, and this is a big but (!), do NOT push your luck. If you're not ready in time, then so be it. It'll be there next year for you. I caution you on taking on too much at this time, because a bad experience at this juncture will be more difficult to overcome, and is it really worth it?! You've got a life time of riding ahead of you, so consider this carefully and trust your gut instinct. Why be a cat up a tree when you can be a contended kitty in front of a bowl of milk (at least for now)! – Mama Tuesday, May 4 Dear
VTwin Mama, One evening he asked me if I wanted to pull out Electra Glide Standard into the garage, and I said of course. Dan stood by me the whole time and guided me through the steps until I pulled the bike into the garage. As I stated earlier, I purchased the V-Star 650 (used) two weeks ago. We have a up slanted driveway, so every evening my husband had me pull the bike up and then back the bike down the driveway and then pull the bike into the garage. Dan was out of town last week and I decided to take the bike out into the street and pull into drive.........I did it....then I decided to take a ride down the street and turn the bike around and pulled into the driveway....my confidence was built and I then decided to take a little spin in the neighborhood....for two hours... it was the greatest feeling. I take my riding course on 4/30/04.........since I know this course will teach me a lot more in how to handle my bike, I am so looking forward in taking this course, also I will be less SCARED TO DEATH, in riding my own bike. My husband, Dan , is my greatest supporter and one last bit of info, Dan asked that I clean our FLHT (after riding for 10 hours on 4/18/04) and pull into garage after I am finished -- and off to work he went. – Cyndi R. in Corpus Christi, TX Dear
Cyndi, Now that you've got the course behind you, it's time to practice, practice, practice on your own bike. Empty parking lots on quiet Sunday mornings is an excellent opportunity to "mimic" the riding course and master the very same skills you worked on, but this time with your own bike. Draw chalk lines for stopping situations and set up cones (or something similar) to place corners, turns and intersection scenarios in your reach. It's a very useful way to gain control over the beastie in a non-threatening environment. You'll find your practice time will serve you well on the road -- it begins to take the guesswork out of how the VStar will handle when under the pressures of traffic and you're likely to make less "mistakes" when a cage is leaning on the horn for you to get a move on! – Mama Thursday, May 6 From Rhonda in regards to dropping her bike on a steep gravel driveway: Well, dij is right! I DID drop my bike in the very beginning
and that set the stage...from then on that was my biggest fear and it
definitely hampered the process. But I wanted to ride so I hung in there
(with the gentle encouragement from hubby) and even tho my biggest fear came
true more than once, I stayed with it and am glad I did. That problem
has passed and I get better and more comfortable every time I go out. I
always try to look at it this way..."what do you want, what does it cost,
are you willing to pay the price?" You want to ride, you have to
make adjustments to do so, and it WILL be worth what you have to do to get it
done. You can do it! And you'll be glad you did! Now get out
there and ride, sister! – Rhonda from Springfield, MO (note
from Mama: ahhhh, nothing like true confessions to help out every reader
who thinks they are alone in the "ickies" that happen -- 'cause it
just ain't true!) Saturday, May 8 Dear
VTwin Mama, I haven't been able to ride since last December. I found out that I have a rare brain disease and a brain aneurysm. I've been on a leave-of-absence the entire year and spent a month in the hospital . . . three weeks in ICU in Ft. Worth, then a week at The Mayo Clinic in Minnesota. So, I've had big life-altering things to think about. Fortunately, I'm doing very well and hope to return to work in a few weeks. Of course, I also hope to start riding again soon. I'm been living vicariously through everyone on the site. What a wonderful site it is!! I'm going to be nervous to ride again...not only due to the amount of time I haven't been able to ride, but also because I've undergone a very serious health crisis. I'm wondering if that's going to affect how I view riding now. I'm very fortunate to be able to have most of my health back and know how frightening it is to think that it could be gone forever. I think that I'll be much more cautious, if nothing else . . . not that I haven't been already. Anyway, I just wanted to share that. I really enjoy this site. I can relate to so many people who write in. Great job, Petra!! – Linda Dear
Linda, As to the windshield, I myself prefer something high enough to cut the wind but low enough that I'm looking over it when I ride. Especially in Spring when bug splat is at its highest! Just cutting the blunt force from my chest keeps my head from taking all the strain. Funny thing is, depending on your height in the saddle, windshields are tricky to "measure" in terms of correct effect. I'm thinking it's worth a shot to trim your current one down so it meets your exact requirements. Let's see if other readers share their thoughts! Now, you've been visiting my site long enough that you can already hear what I would suggest for when you're ready to ride again! Take it slow and easy, head for an empty parking lot and get some practice time in. You'll want to regain your feel for the bike's handling characteristics -- set up a few markers to mimic traffic situations and get your smoothness back for starting, stopping, turns, curves and just a general overall sense of it. As to how your health crisis will affect your actual mental thinking on the road . . . well, that's one only you'll be able to find out by going out and trying. I would suggest that you keep your initial rides to the local area, with treats built-in for small accomplishments (I find a DQ ice cream to fit the bill perfectly!). It's a wonderful way to build confidence and address any riding concerns you might be experiencing without being a hundred miles away from home. Now, smile . . . you're about to continue your adventure in riding with a new perspective . . . and I think it's wonderful! – Mama Dear
VTwin Mama: Dear
Judy, But, as you adamant about making this journey, I would advise that you pick the quietest time of day in your area -- usually early Sunday mornings -- when you're least likely to have cars come behind you and push you faster than you are ready to go. Are you ready for a 6am ride?! Dress warm and give it a try! – Mama Dear
VTwin Mama: Any advice for first time jitters? I have been told to take a deep breath and just hop on, but I don't know. I loved the riding during the class exercises. I had never driven a bike until I bought mine, as a matter of fact, I have not ridden with any one else much. My husband bought a bike right after me and of course he has more experience so he takes off on his while I sit at home and sigh. He doesn't go far yet without me but, I want to ride so bad. I have thought about getting a trike just so I can go on the open road. Help, – Biker wanna be in MS Dear
Biker Soon To Be (!), Now, what to do about the jitters. Yes, the "hop on and get going" suggestion is fine, but I'm sensing that you're not ready for the open road quite yet. Not to fear -- I highly recommend that you have your hubby ride YOUR 250 to an empty parking lot on a quiet morning (you follow in the car) -- and get some practice time in without the distractions of traffic and the like. Try your maneuvers just like you did in the course. Do this lots, even if it takes many, many weeks until you have the confidence to say, "I'm ready for a little neighborhood riding." And have hubby follow you in the car so that you have a support team on hand. Do NOT think you are the only new rider who has done this! Now, with these thoughts, do you think you're ready to hop on?! Me thinks you are! – Mama Wednesday, May 12 For Biker-To-Be who has jitters getting out of the starting gate: I was just like you. I had to have a bike, wanted one for years, and finally bought one. I didn't start out small, I bought a new Harley. My husband rides like the wind and was always off on his, so I started out exactly like you. I had the "first time jitters" so I did the parking lot thing until I was comfortable with the feel of the bike. Then I did the neighborhood, then, when I was ready, I started on the streets. I started early on Sunday morning when there is not a lot of traffic, and just rode. I didn't have the pressure of other cars, and my husband was with me so I had that comfort factor also. I wasn't alone, in case something happened. I did fine and gradually I went further and further. That
was 8 months ago and now I ride to work on nice days and on the weekends hubby
and I just get on and go. I have 3000 miles on my new bike and wouldn't trade
it for anything. The key is riding your own ride. Don't do anything until you
are comfortable. Practice, practice, practice. Your confidence will grow with
every ride! – Megthered (note
from Mama: kudos to you Megthered and thanks for sharing so that Biker
doesn't feel so all alone in this -- 'cause she just ain't! And that's the
truth!) Friday, May 14 More for Biker-To-Be who has jitters getting out of the starting gate: You asked for advice for the 'pre-ride' jitters? My .02 worth would be, go with it. Acknowledge them and know they are there for a reason, then go ride. I'm going into my 39th year of riding. Taken extensive, extended training. Earned my certificate as an MSF RiderCoach. And am very confident in my abilities. BUT.... I STILL get the 'butterflies' before I go out. The jitters are gone by the time I reach the end of the driveway because I need to get to the business at hand, but I do get them. I've always thought of them as my cue to get my 'head in the game' and not to become complacent when riding. I understand about the jitters keeping you from riding too. One tip I've passed on to others that have trouble making that first trip out alone is, go pull out the bike. Start it up BEFORE you put your riding gear on. Then go back in the house and put all your gear on while the bike is out there running and waiting for you. Somehow that doesn't give you as much time to talk yourself out of going. You don't have to go far... just around the block for that first time out. But one small step at a time, each being a little more successful than the last, will help you build your confidence and before long you'll be buzzin' down the road wondering what all the fuss was about. Just remember...Jitters can be a good thing, they're
your reminder that it's time to put your 'edge'. –
Hammerlady (note
from Mama: thanks for the timely reminder that getting your head on
straight before the ride is just as important as anything else! Side Note
for all readers: Hammerlady has provided great amounts of useful
information to my readers over the years and runs a great site and
discussion forum called Shinny Side Up which is fun to participate in!
Just go to http://www.shinnysideup.com) Monday, May 17 For Judy who is trying to navigate faster highway traffic for the first time: Hi,
just thought I might drop a line for Judy about people pushing her to
fast. I ride with my girlfriend all the time and she has the same
dilemma. What I have found works quite well is to ride behind her so
that traffic coming up behind has to deal with me first! I don't let
them push her and by different riding "body language" they
usually don't push me to hard. She says it gives her the extra
security of not having someone right on her tail trying to pass. If
they want to pass, they have to pass both of us and this gives her a
"buffer zone." For Judy, spacing between her husband and
herself is the most important issue as you don't want someone passing her
husband and trying to squeeze between them. He should be able to adjust
his speed to hers to keep that from happening. Hope that helps, and just
keep riding and before she knows it 45 will just be a breeze. – Erv (note
from Mama: wise words born from first hand solutions -- thanks!) Monday, May 17 Dear
VTwin Mama: I have days that I just want to hang it up because I feel that I will never get over the nervous jitters of constantly being on guard for whatever hazard may be ahead. I am so looking forward to the day that I can feel confidant and somewhat relaxed. Will that ever happen????? On another note I do have a question. I am female, 5'7" and riding an HD Lowrider. I cannot get a comfortable position for my right foot. Always feel as though my toe is depressing the brake. My husband feels that this is due to the fact that I am new and will eventually get accustomed to this position. I on the other hand feel that this will never happen not to mention the fact that my heel is resting on my pipes and melting. Help -- I do not know what to do short of changing to forward controls which is fairly expensive and I prefer not to go there at this time. Has anyone else complained of this problem? Maybe I'm just to tall for this bike???? Would appreciate any input. Thanks. – New Rider Dear
New Rider, The key is practice. There simply is no substitute. And this will partially come with time, but you CAN make a huge difference. How?! Practice. While it's fun to go out on the road and take those day trips, scheduling practice sessions (even one hour per week) in an empty parking lot goes a long way to honing the skills you'll need at every juncture, turn, curve, stop, start, etc. By mastering the basics, you'll soon not have to "pre-plan" every move in your head! What do I mean?! Well, it was once described to me by a friend, that as a new rider she couldn't just get to a stop light (things experienced riders take for granted and really don't even mentally consider, consciously at least) -- she had to mentally think through every step (shifting, braking, planting the foot, etc.) it took for her to do a controlled, smooth stop at a light. Whew! That's a lot of mental energy! So, consider practice sessions! As to your right foot position -- well, yes, maybe you'll get more used to it over time, but I'm thinking you've got a problem if you boot is melting on a pipe and you feel like your depressing the foot brake. Unfortunately, I can't think of an alternative solution to forward controls or a new exhaust pipe configuration -- both which are kinda' spendy. I don't think it's a matter of your height, but something is off. Hmmmm . . . readers . . . any ideas? – Mama Monday, May 24 Dear
VTwin Mama, Dear
Pat, If I were to succumb to "psych" talk -- the pages give us an opportunity to express that which is hardest to share in the general riding populace and validate how we feel, in a safe, secure environment that doesn't talk down to our experiences. If I had a nickel for every jitter I've ever felt over the past 25 years of riding, why I'd be . . . hee, hee, well, you know! – Mama Dear
VTwin Mama, Now to the jitters - my husband has a '95 Shadow 600 and to me it is HUGE and SCARY (I am 5'4", about 140 pounds, and at 54 - a bit on the old side to be starting out). I want to start on a small bike (I read your whole section on finding the right bike and sent him excerpts by e-mail) and he insists that small bikes are worthless and dangerous. He insisted on taking me out to practice on the Shadow. I went round and round that parking lot for 2 hours on Saturday, and every time I came to a turn I had to coach myself through it. If that bike was right for me, I would not have still been so terrified after 2 hours. Sunday (May 23rd - our 28th anniversary) we went back again. I went around for about 20 minutes, and in a turn I hit a patch of gravel and fell. The bike took it worse than me but my right leg is all sorts of neat colors and is mighty sore. (Nice anniversary gift - huh? First time the bike ever hit the ground). Even if he gets the part on time to fix the bike, I am afraid to get back on it. I have a lead on a Honda Rebel 250 - 1986 - the woman who owns it uses it to teach so it has probably seen better days, but who says a starter bike has to be new and shiny? My husband hasn't spoken to me since I e-mailed him the letters from your site - oh - except for an ear-splitting F**K YOUR MOTORCYCLE!!!! He screamed that he wouldn't help me register, insure, maintain, etc. and probably won't go to my funeral either. I think it's a guy thing - sorta like not letting go of the remote control. So, I am buying the Rebel (if it hasn't been sold yet) and my Donna has promised to help me with everything - she says she loves me too much to let me get back on the Shadow. We had 8 hours of classroom instruction - one of the most important things we learned was not to ride beyond your limitations. Why is it that everyone except my husband understands that when you first start to ride you start out on the fat little pony - not the big rodeo horse? – Annie B. Dear
Annie, It is next to impossible to analyze your husband's reaction to all of this. Maybe he's realized that he's not a great teacher (most people aren't!) and no matter what he does, this is YOUR journey to take. He's probably one of those people that just took to riding like a duck to water (there are people out there like that!) and he can't cotton up to your need for more time, instruction, etc. My condolences on his lack of support however -- it's true that friends and family can make or break our resolve -- and I can only add that I truly glad to hear that Donna will be standing by you through your next step. As you have read, many women report that starting out on a 250cc bike for the initial phase of practice is a grand idea, and if YOU think it's the right step, then go for it. If hubby continues with his conniption fit, calmly tell him that you are the best person to gauge what YOU need and if he thinks that you can't do it without him, he better get a clue. You are neither helpless, friendless or an idiot! If necessary, store the bike at your friend's house! Then straightened your shoulders, chin up, and get on with it! – Mama Tuesday, June 1 This is for Annie who feels very much like I did when I wrote to you in July, 2002 as "Woe is me." I downsized from my 600 to a Virago 250 after all the support I got here. I put 6500 mile on that great little bike in 4 months. My husband then bought me a brand new 2002 Intruder 800 for Christmas, I loved that bike too and put 24,000 miles on her in 10 months, which included a road trip out west to Colorado. This past October I bought a 2003 BMW R1200C and love it too. I have since put over 13,000 miles on her. All this from someone who was afraid of a 600 bike. Snatch up that Rebel Annie and don't look back. PS: It won't be long until hubby is just an image in your rearview mirror! – Cindy, no longer "woe is me" (note from Mama: spoken from first-hand experience -- the best kind I always say! Thanks -- and kudos to your continuing success in your own journey!) I started out on a Rebel, but more importantly, I know of several people in the area, mostly men, whose primary bike is a Rebel. That's what they ride, period. They are fine, solid, reliable motorcycles. I suppose they might be too light for prolonged highway riding, but otherwise, they're great. – Lili (note from Mama: I agree, the perfect bike for anyone is the one that is perfect for THEM. Thanks for pointing out it's not only women learning to ride that love this bike!) And now a word from Annie: He recommended a Virago 535 - which is probably impossible
to find - for the size and weight that would be best for me. So - it's back to
the drawing board.... In my head is this little fantasy that when I get back
on the test bike - a Suzuki 250 - it will be easy to ride after that monster,
and I will ace the test. Meanwhile, I keep buying Lottery tickets in the hopes
that I will score enough to buy him the bike he wants so I can get what I
want. I think he secretly thinks that if I take his, he can get a new one.
Thank you SO much for your support! xxxooo – Annie
(note from Mama: well, that last part wasn't a twist I imagined, but then
you've been married to him for a long time . . . I think you WILL find the
250cc bike easier to handle the second time around because first of all,
you've already been on the course and second, you sound like you've got more
p's and q's together to tackle it! If you are in the mind to continue pursuing
a 250cc bike for yourself to start out on, go
to this page and you'll see two links at the top to articles comparing the
various makes . . . maybe worth some of your time!) Wednesday, June 2 More for Annie who is thinking practice time on a smaller bike is just right: I would like to recommend to Annie that she go and sit on a Suzuki Savage 650 at a dealer and then sit on the Suzuki 250. Not only sit on them but try pushing them around on the dealer floor while sitting on them to see how well they are balanced and which one would fit her better. I had ridden a Savage 650 for about a year to get my feet wet again and found it to be very easy to ride and light enough to handle without anyone's assistance. The weight difference between the two bikes (250 vs 650) is about 50 lbs. Plus you are actually closer to the ground on the 650 by about 2/10 of an inch. I know it isn't much, but I feel you could ride this bike for years to come and not have to move up if you never wanted too. Good Luck with your search and please do keep practicing and riding. There is nothing better than the thrill of riding your own bike at your own speed!!!! – Lou : ) (note from Mama: hmmm . . . interesting comparison, especially about the weight differential -- it's a great suggestion -- thanks!) Thursday, June 3 Dear
VTwin Mama, Dear
Becky, I think by sharing your own tumble you did two things: you shared an important thought and learning lesson and you found a way to get it out and admit what happened -- a great first step to putting it in its proper perspective, letting it go, and eventually, you'll find the humor in the whole mess! – Mama Tuesday, June 8 For Annie B. who failed the first course test and hubby isn't supportive: I am 40 soon to be 41 this June 17th, and I just got back on two wheels after 20 years. I had been wanting a bike for a couple of years and my husband was going to buy me one for my b-day last year, but if I waited for him I'd still be waiting for my stupid bike as he called it then. I have a 1991 883 Hugger, I didn't want a shiny new bike that I can drop and pay out the ying yang to fix. Especially because I knew that I was almost like a new rider, when I got on it for the first time I was shaking like a leaf and could of made a milk shake on the handlebars. Thanks to this site I have also learn to pick my 500lb bike up all by myself, they should teach that in the MSF course, which I took because there was no way I was going out on the street the way I was riding. I want to say you are half way there, don't stop now! I know it can be hard to work with the one you love, my husband and I own a landscaping business and it nearly tore us apart. There are just some things people can not do together like critiquing each other. A lot of words come out that really should not be said, but you know that it is only because that is the way that person is.. My first bike was a 250 Yamaha and you really have to go with what you like and feel comfortable with most important, you wouldn't ask him his opinion about what type of pantyhose to buy, he could care less. Once he sees you working on YOUR bike he will be there in a heart beat, and why do you need him to register your bike you have a drivers license which I am sure you got with out him and actually it might be cheaper if you got the insurance in your name only. I would look around for that, I have my stupid bike in my name as well as the registration and insurance and I bought a brand new trailer to haul around. I only have 100 miles under my belt, but I have many rallies that I would like to go check out with or with out hubby. Usually with.. So just think in a year from now, you will have many miles under your belt and when he sees you riding down the road then he is going to say "Hey that's my girl riding on that bike." and look at you a bit different. Live To Ride Safe – ST (note from Mama: thanks so much for letting Annie B. know that she's not alone on the hubby-support issue -- lots of words of wisdom to keep her sane going down the road! And kudos to you on your own journey -- way to go! You'll love this next letter!) . . . and now from Annie B. herself . . . Dear
VTwin Mama, I got there (MSF Class) at 7:30 - before the class arrived, and stayed for the whole class. I watched them go through the same exercises I would be tested on (again) and waited - in the rain - for my turn. When they broke for lunch a guy came over for a re-test, and it was just the two of us, the two instructors, his girl, and my best pal Donna. They sent us through the S-box again and again, and finally I said to the instructor - screw the S-box - I'll eat the 8 points, I'm never going to get this and it's just making me nervous. Well, I passed the rest by the skin of my teeth - but I passed. Don't worry out there - I won't be on the road for a while - I'm going to take it slow and practice a lot in parking lots (once I get my bike). It seems every bike shop in the area is selling monsters and crotch-rockets so there aren't many 250's to be found. I located one place with Suzuki GZ520s and Rebel 250s so I am going there to check them out. I know the Suzuki - that was what we used in class. The instructor recommended the Suzuki, - but I am going back to the comparison links on this site before I make up my mind. Now I just have to break the news to Attilla the Husband. His latest -- he won't go bike shopping with me because he doesn't believe in assisted suicide.... – Annie B. Dear
Annie, Wednesday, June 9 More for Annie B. who now has passed her course (!) but hubby is still showing resistance: First of all…Congratulations!!! We are so all proud of you for sticking in there and passing your test! Now about your husband. OH MY GOD. I just had to write in about his attitude. I thought my guy was unsupportive when I started riding, and all he did was laugh at me and make me feel stupid. He certainly never said he wouldn’t come to the funeral of my suicide. I hope he is only being such a jerk because he is genuinely worried about your safety, and he is not truly a monster. Thank goodness your girlfriend is there for you. I just wanted to suggest that when you go look at Suzuki’s, you check out the 650 Savage. It is not much heavier than the 250, and has a very low center of gravity. It really seems like a smaller bike, but can still keep up when you are ready to go faster. Maybe hubby would feel better about it since he is so opposed to the 250. I learned to ride on a Savage, and loved it. It is hard to find used ones, but new ones are fairly reasonably priced. I thought it was a great starter bike. It is awesome that you are sticking to your guns, and getting the bike that is right for YOU. Ride safe. – dij (note from Mama: good message of support here and a again, thanks for pointing out that the 650 could conceivably be considered in lieu of the 250.) Thursday, June 10 Dear
VTwin Mama, Dear
Linda, We sometimes forget that it's ultimately important in every life endeavor to be our own champions. Yes, it's nice to have the support of friends and family, but it comes down to finding the pathways that will lead us to realizing the dreams -- on our own! The power is within ourselves and overcoming the "demons" that keep us from getting to where we want to be is an internal struggle, that if met, makes us stronger in ALL things (as you noted). I love how conquering one challenge changes my outlook on so many other things! I am of course pleased to no end that the VTwin Mama site has provided a base of support for you, and that you've used it to bolster your spirit when the chips seemed down. I doubt anyone reading this letter didn't empathize in your bad moments and cheer with true heart-felt joy in your good times. And so here you are on your one year anniversary, in better shape riding-wise than you could have imagined, and even if you thought you would be farther along in skills, etc., the challenges in front of you can now make sense! The dream NEVER dies inside of us unless we let it and I'm glad to hear that step by step, you are making your dream come true, on YOUR terms. You are an inspiration to every women who rides and we are proud to call you our VTwin Mama sister. Big time hugs, – Mama Saturday, June 12 Dear
VTwin Mama, I am 46 and beginning my third season of riding. I have a 1999 Sportster 1200 sport ("Lucy") and have just acquired a new bike. New to me anyway...."Annie Pearl". A 2000 Heritage Soft Class. I had finally become comfortable with Lucy. She is fun and so nimble but, not much fun on a real long ride. So, I bought Annie Pearl for comfort. I love this bike. It is so much easier to ride than the Sportster as the weight is in the bottom. But, am still working with the size. Not as easy to maneuver around parking lots, tight turns from a stop feel different, forward controls and floorboards, etc. Anyway, we were going to begin a long ride yesterday, heading in the direction of Laconia. (As an aside...if any of you ever ride through NH, route 107 is the best windy road with lots of undulations and very little traffic). I decided that I needed to get used to maneuvering this bike and was going to back her out of the garage, turn her around and coast down my driveway. After much expended effort, about 20 minutes, I finally managed to get to the bottom of the driveway. I felt exhausted and frustrated at how difficult this was. I started her up and was just wobbly as heck taking off. That set the stage. I just didn't feel right on the corners, moving along too slow, felt nervous and jittery stopping. In spite of all this, I kept pushing along. After about 50 miles, we stopped in one of those quaint little New England towns. You know the ones where there is a gas station, two little convenience stores, and everyone who stops in knows everyone else. We got to talking to some of the yocals ....motorcycling is so wonderful! You meet the friendliest |
