Dear VTwin Mama,
Let me just say, I am so thankful for all the comments
on Jennifer and her husband's accident.
So glad they are alright!
I took the MSF Rider course last year and aced my exams. I bought a brand new bike and had two fantastic months of riding. Unfortunately, with two good months of the riding season left (I'm up in the north plains where the weather's not conducive to riding year round) I had just finished filling up my bike at the gas station. I pulled away from the pump, looked both ways, and turned to go toward the exit of the gas station parking lot. Well, a teenaged driver whipped around the pumps in a big pick up truck. He was going the wrong way and way too fast for a parking lot.
The area between the pumps and the cashier/convenience store building was very small and he was going to hit me head on. I swerved to get out of the way but panicked and ran out of room. I hit the building almost head on. I wrecked the front of my bike and did some damage to the side of the bike that it fell on. Since I went airborne into the brick wall, the bike fell over and I fell on top of it otherwise I probably would have broken my leg. I ended up with a mild concussion, some minor scrapes and a few nasty bruises... but $2000 worth of damage to the bike - which I had to pay for since the accident was technically my fault since the kid never actually hit me (and letting him hit me and kill me really was not a good option). I must have been in shock because somehow I rode the bike 20 miles home and don't really remember doing it. To add insult to injury, some jerk at the scene made a comment about how women shouldn't handle motorcycles. Grrr! Well there was a young MAN behind the wheel of the truck that almost killed me and he didn't even STOP to see if I was okay!
I got the bike fixed and by the time the insurance company and the repair shop agreed on the estimate and the parts were ordered, it was really too cold to ride by the time I got it back. The longer I haven't ridden, the hard it seems to be to think about getting back on. So I've been worrying all winter about what I'm going to do in the spring. On the one hand, while I'm driving in my truck all I can think about is how spring is coming and wouldn't this or that road be great on the bike. Then I will be petrified at the thought of getting back on that bike. I get the shakes, I can see the accident over and over, and to this day I will not even gas up my truck at that gas station. Some nights I can't sleep for thinking about it. Some days I just want to sell the bike and forget the whole thing... others I can convince myself that I CAN ride and that accidents can happen to anyone.
The weather is starting to warm up and a few brave souls have been out riding the last few days. I don't know what I'm going to do. I thought retaking the rider course would be a good way to get my confidence back (and focus on how FUN it can be) but the courses around here are full until August.
One of your readers wrote in that riding my "chair motorcycle" might help and a friend of mine said I needed to visualize riding perfectly and with no problems. All this is very useful and has helped on the nights that I can't sleep, but I don't know if it will help when I actually throw my leg over that iron horse again. Oh well, the bike is fixed and paid for and not going anywhere. I guess I'll just let it sit in the garage until I'm ready. If it gets to be two years that I don't ride, then I can make the decision to sell it.
Well, anyway, I didn't mean for this to be so long, I guess it just felt good to get it out there. I'm thankful for the site and for all the comments of the readership. If I ever get brave enough to get back on the bike, I will be sure to let you know. :) Sincerely, – BooBoo in Dakota
Dear BooBoo,
Of all the rotten luck -- to be in the path of an out-of-control
idiot cage. That simply bites. Now, let's explore your options.
One, you could just sell the bike and put this all behind you. There's no shame in that.
Two, you could get in touch with women riders in your area and form your own little mini support group. The reason I mention this is because I truly believe that when we feel alone (and it's a rare occasion when we're truly the ONLY person who has ever gone through something), everything seems worse. I know you know you're not alone, as you read the postings on the Accident Survivors page.
Still, reading is one thing -- doing is another. Ask yourself how you would feel if you had a group to share your hopes, dreams, and disappointments with. And what if these women could rally around you for your first ride out for the new season? Sure, you might still feel jittery, but you would have the immediate support available no matter what happened (decide you still can't climb on the bike, just firing it up, a short one mile ride and that's all you can handle first time out, a longer ride on a quiet Sunday morning, etc.).
So, that's my opinion. If you haven't joined any groups yet -- now may be the time. Check the links at the bottom of the home page for top women's riding groups and check for chapters near you. Even if you're out in the boonies somewhere, get in touch with the nearest chapter to you. Also, check my Opt-in Rider List to see if a VTwin Mama sister is near you.
If you have joined one group or another, now is the time to ask for help. Sometimes we forget that we only need to ask. – Mama
Thursday, March 27
For BooBoo who had an accident early on and is feeling icky about riding again"
I can certainly understand your feelings about getting back on. One thing that helped me after broad siding a van 2 summers ago (hit sand and gravel in a turn) was to ride behind my husband on his bike. Of course I feel very safe with him since he is such a seasoned rider. It gave me the opportunity to again enjoy motorcycle riding, and by him doing the driving....I was able to sit back and relax as we rode. Do I still get nervous? Of course! But the nervousness only lasts until I get out on the highway and start rolling down the street. Then I relax and enjoy. My biggest fear is actually my own driveway! By the way....I also had a head on collision with my house about five years ago, but that was when I was still learning....BEFORE I took the MSF course! Just take it slow and you will do fine. Mama's advice on joining a group such as WOW or WITW is really good. Lots of support there! – Bootygrandma aka Betty (note from Mama: when we know we're not alone is when we are able to go ahead. Thanks for sharing.)
Sunday, March 30
Dear VTwin Mama,
Here
is a link that the couple who
survived the motorcycle accident might relate to.....apparently there
is a chat line available to talk to others in the same situation. –
Cindy Farrar
Dear Cindy,
I don't know how you found this, but thank you, thank you, thank
you! I agree, it is often times helpful to chat with people who have been
in the same boat as yourself. That's the power of sharing and the
cornerstone of the VTwin Mama site. –
Mama